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Finding JOY in my Husband’s Personality: Christmas Break 2015 Edition

A Slightly Better Wife Man Snowblowing

Each year around Christmas my husband takes a couple weeks off of work to just “be”. Some years he takes on huge projects, and some years he just fiddles around the house.  As a young bride it used to drive me crazy when he’d take all that time off of work and not “DO” anything.  I never understood how he could be so content to just watch TV, play games with the kids, read books, and do all the ordinary stuff that I do each day.  He looked forward to it.

Some years I would question why he wasn’t doing MORE with his time off.  If I could take that back, I would!

Our visions of success were different.  His revolved around being an active dad, while my vison of success still looked like motherhood, but with a corner office in the corporate world.

All that time he was doing something.  He was investing time into his family.  Quality time is his love language, and well.

My husband is so good at just “being”, and not from a lazy stand point, but just that he has a content personality. He doesn’t ‘want’ the way I do.  He’s slower paced than I am, and he enjoys life more fully than I do.  He doesn’t just do life differently, I honestly believe he does it better.  He takes note of the little details and takes time to do kind things, even if they aren’t BIG things.  We think in a different way, and I’m really growing to appreciate that.  Actually, I’m growing to down right LOVE that about him.

About 5-6 years ago we bought a snow blower from a neighbor, and ever since we have had the best Christmas breaks together. My husband will take off down the street blowing snow for anyone that needs it (or doesn’t, he’s not picky), and I take on the big projects.

He’s satisfying his desire to be outside while doing something he truly enjoys (blessing people and using his snow blower). I am getting to tackle big projects while he’s home to help with the kids, or help with the big projects while the kids entertain each other.

We’ve found our groove, and MAN, is it ever a good one!

Just for fun, here’s a throwback I found while tackling the BIG project of sorting through our storage room:

A Slightly Better Wife Throwback

 Circa 2004. Our First Kiss.

The pictures below this frame were of some boy I met once when I was 14.  I thought I was in love with him and we mailed letters back and forth for awhile.  THOSE pictures made it into the garbage pile.  Sorry, Cory! We did not write the kinds of things I want my children to run across some day! 

So dear young brides, I’m not going to tell you to lower your expectations (although I think we as women need to do that in general). I am going to tell you to really listen to your husband’s needs.

You can’t change him, but you can inspire him. Most importantly you can change the way YOU think about him.

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Filed Under: All The Posts, Marriage Tagged With: Marriage

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Comments

  1. Jennifer Ackerman says

    December 31, 2015 at 2:13 am

    Love this! Thank you do sharing!

    Reply
  2. Renae says

    December 31, 2015 at 4:56 pm

    Great article and thought provoker!

    Reply

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Hey Friend! I am truly so glad that you’re here today!

At A Slightly Better Wife, I share about faith, homemaking, homeschooling, and marriage—along with my passion for creating a non-toxic, intentional home. Life isn’t about perfection, but I believe in making small, meaningful choices each day to do things slightly better than before.

My love for simple living and homemaking was deeply shaped by my grandparents. I have the best childhood memories of being in the kitchen with my Grandma Edna, learning the beauty of home-cooked meals and a well-tended home. My Grandpa Link’s storytelling and wisdom instilled in me the value of faith, family, and slowing down to listen during the little moments that make life rich. Their influence is woven into who I am today and I’m so grateful for that.

I’m a wife, a momma of 5, and a homemaker at heart. My husband and I met young, just days after my 18th birthday, and we quickly (like within a week) knew that forever was in our plans.

Together, we built our home on the edge of town, where we’re raising and homeschooling our children while embracing a simple, purposeful life in the city.

Here, you’ll find encouragement for your marriage, practical tips for homemaking, and inspiration to cultivate a home filled with faith and love. Whether you’re looking for a recipe, a fresh perspective, or just a place to feel understood, I hope you’ll stay awhile and explore.

Let’s pursue slightly better together!

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