For years I have wanted to articulate our adoption story on this blog. I’ve wanted to present it in a way that is respectful to my husband, and respectful of his past. I’ve wanted to share it in a way that would never waiver or damper the cheer and love our daughter expresses on a daily basis.
I have spoken about it to groups of women, I’ve met up in coffee shops and playgrounds to talk about it, I’ve poured my heart out in bible study, and I’ve been an advocate for parents in custody battles for nearly a decade. Still, I’ve never put it on a paper or shared it here.
I think it’s because once I write it down, it seems so permanent, so final.
Folks, our story is one highlighting a step-parent adoption, but this story is not over yet. Each time my daughter does something new, shows her brave side, comforts a crying child at church, whatever it is, I realize, this is still a part of our story.
The love Jesus gives us, which we are able to give to her, that she shows to the world; the way she continues to grow and mature, this is all a part of our story.
How does the saying go? All because two people fell in love.
Yes, that, but a whole lot of Jesus too.
The strength for the course has come from God alone. Through him, and the people He has sent to be our cheerleaders, our lawyers, our team, and our family (blood or not).
The gift of love and adoption is from him. After all, He has adopted us all, and for that I am eternally grateful.
Adoption day was bittersweet. It was a celebration in a lot of ways; because it was the day it became official to the rest of the world. It was the day my voice began to matter at the doctor’s office, the school, and anywhere else a parent-form was required.
Over the years I have needed that voice as I’ve been an advocate for our daughter, and each time I praise God for it. It is a gift I refuse to take for granted.
I wouldn’t be transparent if I didn’t tell you that day was also a day of heartache for me, as every adoption story begins with brokenness.
As a woman who is a mother and who has played the role of step-mother, adoptive mother, and birth mother, I can tell you without a doubt the love a mother has for her child is all the same, regardless if they were born in her womb or her heart.
An adoption graphic I saw on Pinterest said “Parenthood requires love, not DNA”. I promise you it’s true.
Whatever your story is, I ask that you would find the pieces you can celebrate. Pray over the parts you can’t. Take comfort in believing that God does NOT waste our pain. God sees it all, and he loves you through it all.
We are His, and He isn’t finished with us yet.