“All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.” -Matthew 5:37
For much of my life, I struggled with being indecisive.
Not because I didn’t know what I wanted, but because I hated disappointing people. I wanted everyone to feel loved, included, and appreciated. So instead of giving a clear answer, I would often leave things hanging. I’d say things like, “Maybe,” “I’ll think about it,” or “Let me get back to you.”
Sometimes I genuinely needed time to decide. But other times? Most of the time? I already knew the answer.
I was just afraid to say it. I didn’t want to give an answer that people didn’t want to hear.
Then I came across Matthew 5:37:
All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’.
At first, I thought this verse was simply about honesty. And at it’s core, it is. Over the years, I’ve come to see another layer of wisdom hidden within it, and it has become my motto throughout busy seasons where I really need to keep my priorities inline.
A clear answer is such a gift when you think about it.
When we know our answer, it is actually thoughtful to communicate it quickly and clearly. It allows other people to make plans, adjust expectations, and move forward. When we avoid giving an answer because we’re uncomfortable with saying no, we often leave others waiting in uncertainty.
I used to think kindness meant keeping every door open.
Now I realize that kindness often looks like clarity. If clarity closes a door, that’s okay.
Of course, there are times when we truly need to pray, seek wisdom, and think things through. Once we’re certain though, we don’t need to carry the burden of everyone else’s reaction.
Jesus didn’t tell us to be endlessly available (although that is how I want my children to remember me, as always available). He told us to be truthful.
Sometimes that truth is “yes.”
And sometimes that truth is “no.”
I’ve learned is that every “yes” costs something. It costs time, energy, attention, resources, or emotional capacity. This momma only has so much of those things. When we say yes to something mediocre simply because we don’t want to disappoint someone, we may unintentionally be saying no to something else that has the potential to be excellent.
A yes to one commitment may be a no to family dinner.
A yes to another volunteer opportunity may be a no to needed rest.
A yes to one project may be a no to the calling God has already placed in front of us.
We only have so much room in our lives, friends.
We do not need to fill every available space.
Sometimes wisdom means protecting space and peace for the things that matter most.
The older I get, the more I appreciate simple answers.
Yes, I can help.
No, I can’t commit to that right now.
Yes, I’d love to join you.
No, that’s not a good fit for our family.
No lengthy explanations. No guilt. No endless deliberation.
Just honesty wrapped in kindness.
If you’re someone who struggles with indecision, people-pleasing, or the fear of disappointing others, I want to encourage you today:
You don’t have to earn your worth by saying yes to everything. Seriously.
You can trust God enough to be honest with yourself and others.
You can give people a clear answer, it’s truly a gift to both of you.
You can say no without being unkind.
When the right opportunities come along, you’ll have the margin and freedom to say a wholehearted YES.
May our words be truthful, our hearts be gracious, and our answers be clear.
Let your yes be yes, and let your no be no.
Now, go look up the meaning of this verse and the ties it has to absolute honesty, because it’s so good. The words “let your yes be yes” just stuck with me throughout an incredibly busy season as a young momma and helped me through a lot of decisions.
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